It’s the season for gift giving: how should you participate?

Is everyone ready for Christmas?  This is the happiest time of the year, when friends and family gather together to celebrate the birth of Christ and look forward to the coming of the New Year.  There are family dinners and holiday parties filled with cheer.  I love the magic of Christmas time.  I love seeing lights and decorations.  I love hearing holiday music.  I love seeing people share kindness. 

Underneath the cheerful surface of Christmas, there is stress, anxiety and sadness.  Common traditions and the media will have you believe that Christmas is less a religious holiday, and more of a gift-buying and gift-giving holiday.  Our consumerism society has ingrained into our minds from childhood that giving gifts is the best way to show how much you love someone.  There seems to be tremendous social, marital, and family pressure to shop for and give gifts to everyone that you care about.  Gift giving is even considered one of the “five love languages” of commitment to your relationship.  Many people feel obliged to buy for others just to keep up with the status quo.

Millions of dollars in advertisements will have you believe that you have to purchase a gift for every special occasion: Christmas, birthdays, anniversaries, Valentine’s day, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, graduation, work promotions, milestones, etc.  The list goes on and on.  

Many people around me find December to be the most stressful time of the year.  A great deal of that stress revolves around money, or not having enough of it.  There is also a great deal of anxiety finding the perfect gift for important people in their lives. 

People end up spending way too much money when they aren’t financially qualified to be buying expensive things.  I know people with significant credit card debt hidden from their spouse, yet still looking to buy an expensive Christmas gift way over their budget.  I’ve already heard several coworkers talk about how “money is so tight right now.”  Some of these individuals are making between $50,000 to over $100,000 a year.

In the past, I’ve been guilty of overspending and stressing out over finding the perfect gift.  I remember the year that I got my first decent paying job.  I really went all out and bought nice gifts for all of my family members: a digital camera for my dad ($500), a Playstation ($400) for my cousins, a Louis Vuitton luxury purse for my mom ($1,800), and much more.  I felt proud to give them such nice things.  Then I received my credit card statement and started the New Year heavy in debt. 

In the past, I’ve felt the heavy weight of gift giving obligation on my back.  I’ve gone to the mall and battled the crowds trying to make last minute gift purchases a few days before Christmas.  I’ve experienced the disappointment of receiving gifts that I had no interest in: clothes that don’t fit or random knick-knacks that go straight into the trash bin.  Looking back, this was all extremely stressful and pointless. 

One of the best decisions that my wife and I have made regarding gifts was to just agree not to shop for surprises for each other.  If we really need or want something, we just agree to go and buy it – no need to connect the purchase to a random “gift giving” holiday.  We already have almost everything we could possibly want.  We are trying to minimize the junk we own.  Anything else would just clutter our home.   

Sometimes it is hard for people to understand why I don’t buy an anniversary gift for my wife, or why she doesn’t get me anything for my birthday.  Our attitudes go against common consumerism culture.  Once you are in a committed relationship with your significant other, your finances are linked.  You are now saving for financial freedom together.  Spending money from our same bank account doesn’t benefit our financial future in any way.  Our best gift to each other is sharing the common goal of reaching financial freedom together. 

Every year, I struggle with the gift giving traditions of our society.  My in-laws love to give us gifts, even though we tell them that we are happy just to be in their presence.  They know that I don’t need any material things, but it truly makes them happy to be able to give me a gift.  And if it makes them happy, all I can do is accept their gifts with a big smile.

Gift giving is not necessarily a bad thing.  We still participate in group Secret Santa or White Elephant gift exchanges.  Buying one gift instead of several doesn’t break the bank.  When thinking about gifts for others, we try to put thought into purchasing a gift that the recipient will find value in.  Consumables can be a great gift because it won’t end up in some landfill.  Experiences can also be a memorable gift that lasts.  We recently gifted my father business class flights on Japan Airlines and Singapore Airlines by redeeming some of our credit card points.  My dad has only flown in economy all of his life and these flights will be a real treat for him.  This year, the partners in my group all pitched in to treat all of the staff out to dinner.  We gave speeches of appreciation to our team, praising them for all of their hard work.  They all valued our kind words and the good food.  

Gift giving holidays can motivate people to be generous in donating to charities.  Others can be motivated to give the gift of their time in volunteering for those less fortunate.  There is a shortage of these kinds of gifts.

We will celebrate the season by spending time with our families, sharing joy.  Our health, and the meaningful relationships we have with each other, family, and friends are the most important things in our lives.  We are going to start a new tradition with our kids.  They will never have to worry about getting the perfect gifts for mommy and daddy.  They will grow up knowing that they don’t need to give gifts to show their love.  Their love will show through their attitudes and actions.

Yesterday, we took a family stroll through our neighborhood to enjoy all of the festive Christmas decorations.  Our son was mesmerized by all of the vibrant colors.  This cost us nothing and he had an amazing experience.  

Did you find yourself spending way too much money (and time) on the perfect gift this month?  Did it stress you out?  Remember that Christmas is not about plentiful gifts under a decorated tree.  The best present you can give someone is your presence and your time.  

Side hustles November 2017

The great thing about doing side hustles to generate extra income is that you can hustle on your own terms.  The more hard work, time, and creative effort you put in, the more extra money you can make.  You can hustle as little or as much as you want, whenever you want.  It’s your extra money, and you can choose how you want to spend it.  Instead of focusing on what ideas don’t apply to you, try focusing on different side hustle ideas that you can implement to work for your situation.

Once a month (usually on the 1^st), I like to post a short summary of our personal and financial situation for the previous month.  Here I’ll share some of what’s been going on with our lives and our side hustles. 

Welcome to December, did everyone have a good November?  It was a month filled with Thanksgiving gatherings with our family, friends, and colleagues. I let my guard down this time of the year and eat lots of delicious unhealthy foods (especially sweets).

We took our last vacation as a family of three before our new baby arrives later this month.  We spent 4 days and 3 nights in Carlsbad to visit Legoland and Sea Life Aquarium.  Most of the time was spent chasing our son around the amusement park.  

Our son continues to grow up so fast.  It’s amazing how quickly he is learning now.  He is like a sponge, soaking up everything he hears.  He is starting to say 3 word sentences.  He knows his alphabet, can count up to 20, knows his months of the year, and is learning how to properly say the days of the week.  

Our son continues to love exploring the neighborhood.  He loves touching the grass, flowers, and leaves.  

He just learned that limes come in different colors.  

He’s growing so fast.  

Here’s our monthly summary of side income that we have generated in the previous month of November.

Cash back

On 11.1, I received a $0.90 deposit into my Discover Cashback Checking account.  New Discover Cashback Checking eliminates the previous 10 cent per transaction benefits of the checking account and converts it into a straight 1% cash back debit card.  It won’t be as fun earning 10 cents back on micro transactions and checks cleared.  However, this may open up some extra cash back options since I might be about to pay our mortgage with a debit card and no fees. 

Survey Income

On 11.24, I received 2 checks for $35 each from E-Rewards Medical totaling $70 for survey income.

On 11.30, I received a $40 Virtual Visa debit card from E-Rewards Medical for completing an online survey

Rental Income

On 11.5, we received a net profit of $475 from our rental property.  Our tenants were late on their rent payment and they had to pay $45 in late fees.  This happens every now and then.  They are still great tenants and we hope they stay with us long term. 

Website Income

On 11.21, I received a $100 direct deposit into our checking account from Commission Junction for income generated by the website.  We appreciate your support.

In other news, I was walking my dog and bumped into my neighbor who was about to take his unused mountain bike to the dump.  It was in great condition and I could not let such a beautiful bike go to waste.  I asked if I could take the bike off his hands and I scored a free mountain bike!

Monthly Totals:

We earned $0.90 cash back

I earned $110 from paid surveys

I earned $100 from income generated by this website

We earned $475 from rental income

All of this totals $685.90 from our side hustles for the month of November.  It’s been a busy month so we haven’t been able to bring in as much side hustle income as in previous months.  We are expecting more side income next month.  Can you believe 2017 is almost over?  What have you done to bring in extra money?